Chapter 24 Part 2/2:

A Lemon-flavored High Honors Student

***Drug use***

It felt like an eternity, standing there with David's hands around mine and he still hadn't let me go.
"Could you please let me go?" I asked, my vocal cords still shaking and nearly causing my voice to crack.
"Is that really what you want?" David asked with a hint of hesitation in his voice, still holding onto my wrists tightly as if he would lose a golden ring in an ocean on a windy day.
"Yes" I said flatly, hoping he would reciprocate and he did.
There was a weird feeling inside of me when he let me go, it was like there was a void. It was like I had fallen back into reality, like I hadn't just been so harshly interrogated by David. That was interrogation, right?
I finally opened my moist and glazy eyes, hoping he wouldn't notice the sheen that coated them and was about to spill over at any moment if he said one more harsh thing to me. I looked at my wrists, they weren't red and they didn't hurt at all despite the stable hold he had on me before.
Finally my eyes met his and he was smiling, that grim and smug smile I knew all too well. I watched him as he watched me back away from him slowly, far enough to the point where I thought he couldn't see my wet and dreary eyes.

What an asshole. He was seriously standing there watching me break into a million pieces, and he was enjoying it all.
"You're fucking sick" I whispered, glaring at him.
He laughed. "Sick? Possibly. But honest? Hell yeah" his eyes glanced me over, and I wished I could make him close his eyes. What made him think that he had the right to look at me that way?
"I'm leaving" I said to him, waiting for a response.
"And? You said that already...If you really wanted to leave you would have left already" he said to me in a mocking way as if he was the center of the universe, screw him.
I thought about it for a second. He was right, why did I say that? I should've just left, there was no need for any statements. "Okay" I said forwardly, not wasting anymore time.

I headed for the door and this time he was the one making statements. "Wait!" He called out to me,  grabbing my arm.
He was that guy hanging off of a cliff, holding onto my hand for dear life and now he was begging for me to stay just before I was about to give up and let him go.
"Can we please just relax for a few hours? I didn't mean to make you upset, I just wanted you to get a grip for once and stop acting like you're so perfect. Come on, I don't want to argue with you...This was supposed to be fun" he said.

I didn't understand it at first what was fun about being in his room? But then it dawned on me, I got the drift and felt disgusting and cheap. "You're an asshole and you're gross! I'm not that kind of girl and either way you would have to work much harder than that to get a favor from me!" I hollered.
He looked at me like I was crazy again, furrowing his eyebrows. Great,  way to make yourself look like an ass yet again Melody, I said to myself.
"What's wrong with you? Man, you really have a filthy mind for such a quiet girl" He said looking at me again, and then his words started floating around in my head again. 'I see right through you.' A chill rushed up my spine and I shuddered violently like I was in the middle of Antartica, naked.
"I don't have a filthy mind- I just know what guys want..." I said coldly.

 His face looked pale all of a sudden, "Well, not all guys are like that. You need to live more. People are only human...We all make mistakes" He said solemnly.
"I bet you know alot about mistakes, after all you cheated on your girlfriend technically...What? Like two times now? That's just sad" I said as I smirked in his face and counted to the number two on my fingers, trying to rub it in. His eyes rolled around, up and down and then he looked back at me with his face straight and his lips tight, showing how annoyed he was. "It wasn't cheating!" He said sternly as if his words had authority and whatever he says goes just because he said so.

"Well then what do you call putting your tongue in some other girls mouth? That's cheating! It may have just been kissing but that's still cheating! How would you feel if Casey did that with some random guy?!" I knew I had practically went off on a rant and was preaching but obviously he needed to hear what I had to say if he thought that what happened last night wasn't cheating. Feel the burn David, feel my wrath, feel my power, I said in my head.

He was about to answer me but then he just fell back onto his bed, sitting on it  while he slapped his hands on his thighs and let out a long sigh. "Look do you just want to argue with me?" He asked, sounding irritated.
I crossed my arms over my chest that was barely even there anyways, it was like a flat wall. "I just want answers" I said sternly, "Don't avoid the situation" I added.
"What answers?" He asked, with his face showing that 'I'm dealing with a crazy bitch' expression written all over it.
"Well, what was that?" I asked again, getting more defensive.
"What was what?" He asked, dumbfounded.
I liked this, the tables had turned and now he was in the same position he had put me in just a few minutes ago. Of couse, I hadn't grabbed him by his wrists and invaded his personal space, but he was still in my previous position.
"The kissing, the touching-everything...You said you cared about me. What the hell was all of that?" I nearly pleaded, with my eyes expanding so wide that they nearly created new galaxies in outer space.

He looked around the room, and then at me. He looked at the floor, and then back at me. Silence was surrounding us and I was about to lose it any second if he didn't say anything but he did eventually even though it was a few seconds too late. "I don't know what it was. But I do care about you-Talking to someone for a month and getting to know them kind of does that to you...You become connected to that person, it's like you're attached to them after they tell you things you never imagined they would" He said gently, not even looking at me.
He cleared his throat "Look can we just do something fun and forget about this all?" I could tell he was getting frustrated with me again.

 There was nothing else that was said after that, I didn't know what to say. At least he cared, that made me feel kind of salient in some strange way. But the fact that he didn't know what it was angered me a little bit. How could he not know?
I looked at him, and he gestured for me to sit beside him, on the edge of his bed. I was nervous but  walked over to him ambly and  slowly, sitting next to him. There was a long awkward silence that surrounded us until a car drove by and then the sound of its engine faded and we were sitting in stillness again. For some reason I began feeling uneasy, like we might get caught.
"Soooo what do you want to do?" He asked as he looked around his room which was actually alot more cleaner than I imagined it would be.
His gaze shifted towards my legs and he frowned. "What's with the skirt? It's fall you do know that right?" He said sarcastically while chuckling his little heart away.
I rolled my eyes and sighed deeply. "I was rushing this morning and my wardrobe is all fucked up right now considering the fact that I haven't been to school in a whole month" I said bitterly.

 "Oh" he said, getting up and walking over to the night stand by his bed and opening the drawer. He looked down at whatever was in the drawer and an evil grin flickered on his face.  He looked back towards me and I looked at him nervously, and quickly looked away.
I got up and walked over to the window, peering out of the corners and looking all around as far as my eyes would let me. "Are you sure we're alone?" I asked, him. It looked like we were but I just wanted to make sure.
David sighed and shook his head at me, still looking down at whatever was in that drawer. His fingers were rustling around in there and I couldn't see what he was touching and moving around but it looked like he was looking for something he had been hiding. It was like he was sifting for gold in that drawer. "Yeah, we're alone" He said with leisurely, tilting his head and squinting at the back of the drawer as he kept searching.
Something just kept leaving me feeling unnerved. "Are you sure? Where's your mom? What about your dad...isn't he like going to be around more or something? Where's your dog?" I asked, frantically. I could feel my heart thumping in my chest, I had never ditched school before so I had no clue what to expect.
He laughed and smiled. Finally his hands stopped sifting around in his drawer and he was just grinning with glee, still holding whatever was in that drawer in his hand- not wanting me to see it yet. "Yeah, just relax. No one's coming here, my mom is at work, my dad is doing some silly shit for his campaign and Chi-Chi is in a kennel right now...We- Well my parents  don't like leaving her home alone" He said rolling his eyes, only sounding excited when he talked about his dog. Kennels? I guess that was something rich people did because any average person would just leave their dog at home."Shit! Where is it?!" He whispered.

His voice suddenly peaked with curiosity and he turned to me, raising his eyebrows. "Wanna have some fun?" He asked.
I looked at him like he was insane. Wasn't that the whole purpose of ditching in the first place, to leave that boring and rigidly structured hell hole to finally let loose and do whatever the hell you wanted? "Um yeah, I think that's kind of the reason we're even here" I said sardonically.
He looked back down at whatever he had in his hand, shaking his head. "Hmm, I don't know..." His voice trailed off before he finally finished his sentence "I'm not sure you can handle this".
Why did he insist on pushing my buttons and playing silly games? "Cut the shit David! What the hell is in your hand?!
Just before I could even say anything else he threw what was in his hands over towards me and it landed on the edge of the side of the bed I was standing near. I grew cold, it was like I was standing in a freezer, being frozen. My body remained still but my eyes moved fiercely, looking over the viridescent green and brassy looking substance in the plastic bag, it was marijuana.

"Ugh gross! Drugs! DRUGS! That's really what your idea of fun is? Sitting here and smoking your lungs away?!" I shrieked.
He laughed. "You see, I knew you couldn't handle it. You were so interested in my drug use when we first got here yet now you're acting like you're scared of marijuana. I knew this was too much for you- I should've brought a smoker with me instead of bringing you here, you're no fun"
I scowled at him, "Oh please! I know how to have fun! I'm not scared and I can handle anything. I just don't see what's so amazing about smoking until you're black and blue in the face, smoking causes cancer and pot is the gateway drug! That's how people get addicted to hard drugs like heroin, and crack, and crystal meth, and oh my God!" I stopped mid sentence just thinking about all the lives that have been ruined from drugs.

"You really believe that shit?" He asked and before I could even repsond be cut me off. "Nevermind, it's obvious you believe that shit but to be completely honest with you...There's nothing wrong with weed I mean, yeah you can get high off of it but it's natural. It grows in the ground, people with cancer smoke it, it has medicinal benefits, and it's soooo much fun to smoke it for recreational purposes" He yipped with glee, like a little boy in a toy a store. "Everyone has smoked weed at least once in their life I bet one of your parents did, it's just a good experience-" He added.

I shook my head at him. "Well, I don't need the experience of trying something that can kill me and harm my body in the long run"
He rolled his eyes at me and said "It's not going to hurt you if you do it just once..What are you afraid of?"
What a typical thing of him to say, I thought to my self. "David! I could become a loser...Most people who smoke pot are losers. I need to keep my grades up so I can get into a good college some day! I can't sit here smoking my brain cells away! If I don't get into college, then I will end up with a shitty job for the rest of my life, and I will be so stressed out trying to pay my bills and  I want to get married some day- I don't want my husband to worry about bills and debt and I don't want him to look at me as a failure!" I shrilled.
David looked at me, just shaking his head left and right, laughing hysterically. He nearly cried, he placed his hand over his chest as he tried to stay balanced and not fall to the ground. "You see! That's EXACTLY why you need weed!" He couldn't stop laughing and I just stood there making faces at him, with my arms crossed over my chest as I rolled my eyes.
"It's not funny" I retorted.

"Oh yes it is!" He said between his laughs. "You need to chill out, I mean really who thinks that far ahead into the future? Smoking pot one time won't fuck up your life...Don't you want to at least experience something new?"
I looked over at the cannabis, it didn't look that dangerous. "Where's it from?" I asked curiously.

"I know a guy, he grows it in his house and sells it-it's pretty pure." He looked at me. No, he looked through me and it scared me. "Come on, live a little"
I thought about it, if anything went wrong he would be right here with me. School ended in 3 hours, we had the time. I was kind of interested to know what people felt when they got high, was it really that great? Marijuana kind of was one of the lesser evils when it came to the drug world. "Fine, but just once" I said slowly, somewhat nervous but thrilled at the same time.
He chortled, "There's a first time for everything but trust me, after you try this, this probably won't be the last time." He walked over to the door, and shut it.

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As soon as the door closed behind us, everything changed. David and I sat on his bed with the plastic bag in front of us and a bunch of thin white square sheets laying around on the bed covers.
"What are those things?" I asked innocently.
"Rolling papers" he replied swiftly as he opened the bag of cannabis and sniffed it. "Smells right to me" he said to himself. He looked over at me and then looked back down again. With full concentration, he lined up the green hashy looking stuff right in the center of the sheet of rolling paper.
A speck of the green bud landed on my uniform right where it said 'honor student.' Honor students definitely didn't do things like this, or at least that's what people thought. I tried fidgeting with it, but it left a hashy green mark on my uniform. I sat there and scratched at it with my nails and it still didn't come out, there were still greenish-brown marks on it. I quickly brushed it out of my mind, I could always wash it later. I contined watching David shuffle green stuff around on the rolling paper.
I gasped when he passed one towards me. What did he expect me to do with it? "You know if you don't want to do this, you don't have to. I don't want you to feel like I'm forcing you or anything." He was looking at me like he honestly meant what he said but it was too late now, I wanted to do this.
"No! I'm fine-I want to do this!" I said as thrillingly as I could. I bit my lip as I looked down at the bag of cannabis that was open and now facing my direction. Did I just go and grab it? Or pour it out? The rolling paper in front of me was just laying there on the ground, empty. "Um, are you going to help me?" I asked, laughing nervously and I could feel my cheeks flush.

He smiled at me and picked up the bag of cannabis, shifting his body a little so he could demonstrate better. "Watch me do it", he picked up the bag of cannabis and tilted it so the green dusty particles started pouring out and falling onto the rolling paper, but he did it gently and slowly, making sure to move his arm down in a straight line so all of the particles were evenly dispersed right dead smack in the middle.
"You have to line it up in the middle otherwise it won't roll right and pieces will fall out" He picked it up now, about to roll it and then his eyes stopped, and intensely gazed at something in the mixture.
"Fuck" he muttered, I was just sitting there confused watching it all. "You see that?" He said, pointing to a big green brassy clump of weed.
He continued, "It's too big, you have to grind it with a grinder or something rough", he looked around the room and then he raised his voice saying "OR you could just use your fingers if it's not that big."
That's what he did, I watched him move the green bud back and forth between his fingers and it crumpled, breaking down into smaller pieces. After that, he held the ends taut and rolled up the piece of paper, licking the last fold with his tongue and sealing it over with his fingers.
The end result was something that looked reminiscient of a cigarette besides the fact that is was kind of bulky and rough. David did the same to his and then he turned to me, "And now...." he sounded like one of those announcers on a TV show when they're about to announce something dramatic, his voice was trailing off and my stomach began doing back flips, this was really about to happen.
"Now what?" I asked.
David lowered his eyes at me and gave me that mischevious little grin he always seemed to have. "Now, we smoke" he said with his voice full of suspense,as he handed me the reefer he had just helped me put together.


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After about 5 minutes of frustration and white puffy clouds of herby smoke trails, winding all around us, I was starting to believe something was wrong with me. Either that or weed wasn't all like people cracked it up to be. This was more confusing than I thought it could ever be.
"David! I don't feel anything! Smoking weed is over-hyped..No wonder why losers smoke this shit-they must be brain dead!" I yipped, annoyed.
"Relax, don't think about getting high! Just smoke it and it will happen eventually-I've been watching you for about 5 minutes and you're not really smoking it" he said, frowning at me.
"I am smoking it!" I retorted.
"Yeah, you're taking it in but you're not smoking it correctly" he added.
At this point I was beyond frustrated. "Well what the fuck am I doing wrong? I didn't know there was specific instructions on how to smoke?!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands up in the air, frustrated.
A black speck fell on his bed after I did that and he brushed it off, leaning on the tip of his elbow, turning to face me. He reached over and grabbed it from my between my fingers, keeping his in his other free hand. He mumbled, "Here, I'll hold it for you but when I put it between your lips you have to suck it in like you're drinking something out of a straw AND hold it in as long as you can...It's going to tickle your throat a little bit but just do it" He said, shifting closer towards me.

  I nodded and then he asked me if I was ready. "Now?"
"Uh, yeah" I said in a bratty tone, as I rolled me eyes and  leaned over closer towards him so he could put it between my lips. His fingers were grazing against my chin while he did so, they smelled like weed- everything smelled like weed.
I did just as he said, sucking in the smoke like I was sipping on a straw. It was warm and invaded my mouth, engulfing every space in there, like a dark and dusky cave filled with eerie looking smoke. My mouth became warm and I tasted the herby and pungent taste of weed in my mouth, it was kind of gross and definitely was an acquired taste.
The need to cough was definitely there, I couldn't hold this in. "Yeah, like that..Now just hold it in" David said watching my every move. I knew he was waiting for me to cave, but I kept it in, resisting the urge to cough.

It was getting harder and harder each second. Exactly how long were you supposed to hold this shit in? I closed my eyes and held my hand over my chest. Milky, snow white clouds filled the air as I began coughing like I had pneumonia. I felt lighter, like I was being lifted up or something but that was it. "Yes! That's how you do it!" David said, cheering me on.
"I- I dont really feel anything...I feel lighter, if that makes any sense" I said slowly, really wondering if something was wrong with me.
"You did it right! It takes time...Just keep doing what you did and trust me you will feel it, it's going to hit you so just chill out and wait for it" he said reassuringly, and I did as he said.
Trying to relax, I laid my head back on the pillow beside him and he did the same. We were both looking up at the ceiling, smoking. We drifted away into another entity, between the clouds, it didn't feel like we were here on Earth anymore. I was mellow and calm, it felt like nothing could go wrong. Here in this place- whatever it was, it was easy to forget about everything. My grades, my family, my future- everything. It all just faded away and I was just left here in this blissful state of being.

 "If  we both were some kind of fruit what would I be?" He asked before taking another hit and coughing a little.
I turned my head towards him and giggled, "Is that the weed talking already?" I asked.
"A little bit." He chortled, and then straightened his face out a little "But seriously...What would I be?" He asked again.
I thought about it long and hard. "Hmm" and then it came to me. "A watermelon!"
"A watermelon?!" He furrowed his eyebrows at me.
"Yeah! You're over bearing and hard to handle some times...You're alot to carry"
He chuckled a little, at least he laughed. "I guess that is kind of true" He admitted.
Things got quiet, until I took another drag  and exhaled, coughing and wheezing,watching the smoke clouds slither into the air like a snake and nearly touching the ceiling. "What would I be?" I asked him.
Without hesitating, he answered me. "That's easy! You would be a lemon."
I giggled under my breath. "Why?"
"Because.." His voice drifted on like a sail boat in the ocean. "You're bitter yet you keep me wanting more-hoping you will become sweeter or something"  He paused for a moment and turned to me with a cocky grin on his face, exhaling and letting all of the smoke in his mouth blow right into my face. "But you won't because you're just a lemon"

"Yeah, well you're just a watermelon!" I snippily replied, sticking my tongue out at him, which only made him laugh more. I quickly  sucked in the warm smoke and blew it out into his face. He squirmed around, throwing his hand up at me as he tried to blow the smoke out of his face.
"Stop being such a brat!" He hissed, pinching my arm. He coughed again, exhaling and turning to face me as stillness surrounded us again.  "If you could have one car what would it be?"

A car? I never really thought about cars, I thought they were a dis-service to the planet. This question was hard for me but I kind of had an idea of a car I would enjoy driving in. "A Volkswagen Beatle! They're so cute and look like little lady bugs! OR Turtles!" I squealed, with my eyes expanding as I laid there just thinking about what it would be like to drive one of those things. The ceiling looked like it was spinning and for some reason it made me happy, I smiled at it.
"Really?" He huffed, and then shook his head a little. "You know I shouldn't be surprised that you said that- you seem like the kind of person who would drive a car like that...That was a very typical response from you yet I still wasn't expecting it"

I turned my head towards him again, frowning and sitting up. "You think you know me, oh so well" I said, mockingly.
He rolled his eyes at me, " I do know you oh so well" He said, imitating my voice. Flashing me a daring smile he said,  "Ask me a question, I bet you I remember everything you could've possibly told me when we talked on the phone one of those nights"
I looked at him like he was crazy "Everything?"
He nodded, "Yup!"
He was being way too confident, there was no way he remembered everything that I said. "Okay then, well since you're so confident and you want to bet, I will ask you 5 questions. But if you get any one of them wrong you have to buy me a diamond necklace- a real one!"
"A diamond necklace?"
My smile grew wider at the sound of his slight intimidation. "Yep! You heard Marilyn Monroe say diamonds are a girls best friend, everyone knows that! Square-cut or pear-shaped those rocks don't lose their shape, diamonds are a girls best friend!" I chimed, reciting the lyrics.
"You never striked me as the materialistic type but fine if that's what you want that's fine." He raised his eyebrows, and looked at me doubtfully "But what if I win? What do I get?" He asked me, suddenly sounding more confident.
"Whatever you want, duh!" I said, rolling my eyes and taking another hit.
A sly expression trailed across his face. "Okay then, if I win you have to kiss me"
What the hell? He was really pushing it. "Are you crazy? Do you have amnesia? You have a girlfriend REMEMBER!" I hollered, as best as I could but for some reason it was hard for me to be genuinely angry at him right now, I was in the best mood ever. It sounded like a very stern whisper, instead of a holler.
He laughed confidently, looking up at the ceiling and away from me. "Don't be silly...I love Casey. This kiss would just be a like a farewell you know...Good riddance."
"Okay then, whatever you say...Are you ready?" I said peculiarly and slow, raising the pitch in my voice.
"Ask away, sassy-pants"
I rolled my eyes at his statement, and turned my head towards him. "Okay, watermelon!" He smiled at me and then the bet began.

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I was pretty sure I was stoned yet I wasn't completely out of it- I still had my senses if that even makes any sense. I knew, a lie from the truth- being stoned was pretty different from being drunk and oddly enough, it wasn't that bad. It was like we were on some trivia show like jeopardy, I asked a question and he answered.
"When's my brithday?"
There was no delay, "December 18th" Right.
"What's my favorite movie?"
Like lightning, "Jeepers Creepers" Another one right.
"What's my favorite quote?"
Surely, this question had to stump him a little bit. I laid back and watched him try to recite the famous quote I loved. "Hmm, well I can't remember it word for word but it was pretty fucking depressing. It went something like this: Every human walks around with a unseen sadness. They may not make it obvious, but it's there if you look deep. " Shit, he got that one right too.
"Hmm, if I could travel what are 2 places IN THE COUNTRY that I would want to go?"
"That's easy! California and New York City! I remember that day you told me you wanted to see if the city really never sleeps" Damn, I was losing this bet.
"Okay, don't get too cocky. What's the one thing I would like to exist in my life time?"
His face fell flat, and he looked nervous. Maybe I would win this bet after all. "I remember this! Just give me a second!" White smoke raised into the air as he exhaled and his lips made a whistling noise. "You want to see someone invent a time machine" he turned to me, looking smug. Fuck him.
I didn't say anything, I was baffled. How could he remember all of that? David was dangerous, it was obvious I needed to watch what I said around him. I laid there with my head on the pillow, taking it all in.

 I remained still, not moving any bone in my now tense body. Everything seemed to move slower.
David turned his head towards me, even though I had turned my head away from his and was just concentrating on the ceiling, smoking what was left. "I won- where's my kiss?" he asked mischeviously.
I turned my whole body around and he did the same, mirroring me. Our eyes fell upon eachothers and I rolled my eyes. "Okay, fine. Let's get this over with" there was no fighting with this guy so I figured what the hell, it wasn't like I hadn't kissed him before anyways.
Leaning in, I closed my eyes and puckered my lips a little but I didn't feel anything-his lips weren't there. I raised my eyebrows a little, maybe it was the weed and my judgement was a little off. I inched closer and still felt nothing. David was still on the bed, wasn't he? Was this what it was like to kiss someone while under the influence, you feel nothing at all?
Growing fed up, I opened my eyes and David was there all right. He was backing up away from me, making me chase his lips. "Hey!" I exclaimed softly.
That complacent and proud smile he had across his lips was really irritating to look at. He loved playing games. "Wow, you know...I thought you said this was wrong yet here you are getting ready to kiss me and you didn't even put up a fight" he took a drag of the weed and exhaled. He turned towards the night stand behind him and placed the the reefer on it. Was he serious? He was the one that suggested this- this was his idea not mine. He looked down at my vexed face and smiled some more.
Before I could even speak up and defend myself he kept going on, taking control of everything as always. "It's okay, don't worry. We can still kiss since you wanted to kiss me so bad. And look at it this way...You still got your necklace" he said before laughing.
    I didn't know what he was talking about until he started pointing to the blemish on my neck. Wise ass.
Time moved like a sedated patient in a hospital bed, moving all lethargic and slow as it dragged along hopelessly. Everything felt like a picture in a photo album. Turn the page, and there's a new iamge in front of you. David's face striking face was in front of mine, there was no denying it- he was pretty hot but this was wrong. Flash, his forehead and the pieces of hair draping in front of his face was now the only thing that I could see. I closed my eyes, and felt the warmth of his hand on the back of my neck. It was too late to stop him. His warm lips rested against mine. He pulled his lips away and I could feel the cold air grace them. There was a pause, a swift one. It didn't take long for David to kiss me again, moving his lips slowly with mine, and it was very alluring. The stroke of his tongue along my bottom lip made me open my eyes slowly.
I squirmed around on his bed like it was 5am in the morning and I had to wake up for something annoying like school.
He was lying there still looking at me when I pushed his hand away from my neck and broke the kiss. I was very confused now, I was tripped out and it wasn't just the weed. It was David.
David was sitting there licking his lips and simpering "Mmmm, lemon" he quickly frowned and decided to be a wise guy, tracing my lips with his finger. "Bitter! Yet somewhat sweet...Hmmm."

Chapter 24 Part 1/2

 A Lemon-Flavored High Honors Student

There was a stillness in the air as I sat in David's room, on his bed.
David walked into the room with an irregularly shaped plate carrying an overly large sized brownie on it. "There's more... Do you want one?" he asked while nearly shoving one in his mouth, walking over to the table beside his bed and placing it there.
I examined them closely, "Are those safe?" I asked him while curiously eyeing the heaps of chocolate goodness he had held out in front of me. "I thought you weren't allowed to eat sweet and fattening stuff Mr. Footballstar?" I teased.
He laughed at me while frowning, "You seriously think I would try and get you high?!" He asked, stunned while looking down in my direction, noticing that I wasn't smiling or trying to laugh it off as if what I said was some kind of joke. Like the polar caps in antartica melting, the ocean expanded and so did his blue eyes. "Wow. Okay I'm not a druggie and I wouldn't trick you into doing something like that!"
  Things got quiet after he said that, I could tell he was getting a little annoyed with me but he continued on, talking as if I hadn't just said such a stupid thing. " The football season is almost over-and I'll be so glad when it is... we have 3 more games left so I can eat whatever I want" I looked at him like he was crazy, and then I started thinking about what the girl said to me a few minutes ago.
"Don't you love football?" I asked curiously, even though I was practically being nosey at this point.

He smirked as he laughed somewhat sarcastically. "I don't love football, I mean- I like it but it's just something to do I guess" His voice trailed off and he got silent after he said that, looking out towards the window before he continued "Our school is finally going to participate in water polo this year...I' m trying to get on the team" he sat down on the edge of the bed right beside me and smiled at me like I was supposed to say something like 'good luck', but I didn't.
I turned around quickly, noticing an orange tinted pill bottle with pills lying beside it and a glass of water. Maybe he was finally taking his meds, either that or it was a cover up.
I  had nothing on my mind, suddenly I began regretting coming here with him. David had a big room yet right now it felt so small and suffocating, he was sitting so close to me and all I could smell was chocolate and that heavenly smell that surrounded us that night we danced at my uncle's wedding.
His bed was soft- too soft, it was almost as if I could fall right through it. David was looking at me now, noticing that something was wrong. "I'm sorry but this was just wrong- We have to go back!" I said softly, looking away from him.

David got up from the bed and faced me, like a man. "We can't go back it's too late now" he said casually.
"We should be in class right now! People are going to realize that we're gone! Especially Ms.Johnson and then they're going to look for us! We might get suspended! I can't have my record look horrible- it's already pretty ugly! Oh my God I've been gone so long! What was I thinking?!" I was walking around the room, screaming and yelling, freaking out and having a nervous break down.
I looked at David who was now looking at me like I had issues. "I'm leaving!" I said to him as I headed for the door.
He laughed at me "Okay, go ahead. I just hope you realize that by the time you walk there school will be over  but hey, to each their own"

I was just half way through the door before he stopped me and said "Calm down! Jesus Christ, you act like the world is going to end by missing a few hours of school- it's not that serious sassy-pants"
I hated it when he called me that, and he had no room to talk in this situation because he probably had no idea what it was like being a normal person.
"Oh yes, you know you're so right!" I exclaimed sarcastically, turning and looking him dead in the eye. "Of course the world won't end for you, but it sure will for me...You know some people actually have to work for things in life- not everyone has money flowing out of their ass every second of the day. Not everyone can afford to fuck up and then just pay all their problems away" I said bitterly.

There was a silence that stood between us after I said that and I immediately regretted saying that but it was too late now.
I looked up at him slowly, trying to avoid eye contact with him but he was looking straight at me with his azure blue eyes.
I knew he hated when I said stuff like that. You would think that after talking to him that whole month I would've learned from my mistakes, but I still hadn't learned yet. Every time I  went on one of my little rants about money and status; He always got tense and rigid, not really saying much to me and sometimes he hung up on the phone, not even bothering to at least argue with me.
"Why do you do that?" He asked me monotonously, covering his face with his hand now, just resting his head there like he couldn't even bare to look at me.
"Do what?" I asked, leaning against the well beside him and trying to make it seem like I had no idea what he was talking about.
"You know what-" He said with his voice trailing off, looking down at me like I was dirt or something.

Turning to him, I smiled insidiously knowing just how to turn this around. "Why do you do that?" I asked him, raising my eyebrow.
He was clearly getting irritated now, rolling him eyes and crossing his arms over his chest. "What are you talking about? This isn't about me- it's about you being a judgmental, inexperienced brat"
I definitely wasn't a 'judgmental inexperienced brat', was I? I mean sure, the inexperienced part could've held some truth to it, I still had alot of my life to live. Was I really a judgmental person though? Before I could even try and defend myself he spoke some more.
"I sat there and listened to everything you told me. When you told me your dad let your mother have full custody over you and Jessica, I didn't judge you. When you told me your dad emptied out your mothers bank account and took all of that money and brought a house up in the hills with that new whore he's dating, I didn't judge you. When you told me your mom stopped working and your house was on the verge of facing foreclosure, I didn't judge you. So why do you think it's okay to judge me?" He said that as if I was a nuisance to him.

"I never fucking asked you to listen to my problems David!" I retaliated.
"Yeah but I did, you know why?" He asked me, but I didn't even bother giving him an answer. He was just being an ass at this point. "Okay then be that way- But I listened because I cared, I really felt bad for you because you live a lie everyday"
I looked at him, wanting to hit him where it hurts. He knew nothing about my life besides the bits and pieces I had told him, now he was crossing that invisible line now, the boundary. "Excuse me?" I said, raising my eyebrows and walking even closer to him.

"You heard what I said. Come on, don't act oblivious, you know it and I know it. You just put on this act, you always say you're 'okay' or 'I don't care'. You walk around like you can handle anything, you walk around like you're so perfect and nothings going wrong but I see right through you- it's all a big facade"
David was, dangerous. I felt so vulnerable and naked 'I see right through you' , his words repeated on and on in my head. "I don't act like I'm perfect, I just don't see the point in crying about shit that you can't change. I'm sorry I'm not depressed and crying a fucking river every 5 seconds" I said, rolling my eyes at him.

 Instantly and abruptly my body lurched forward, David grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer to him, so close to the point that I could feel him breathing on me, so close to the point that he probably could hear my heart beating right now.
I tried looking at him but he was just too close for comfort right now, I couldn't dare to face him like this. I closed my eyes and lowered my head a little, still feeling his grip around my wrists. Intimidation surrounded me, there was no escaping him. He smelled so lovely yet he was acting deadly. I felt his hands clench even tighter around my wrists now, and let out an "Mmm" noise, a scared one- like a squeal.
I could feel the pressure of his words against my face like the beat of a  drum as he spoke. His breath was warm and it made me feel like I could melt and disappear at any given moment. "Tell me" he said almost in a whisper.
"Tell you what?" I asked, confused.
"Tell me the fucking truth, just be honest for once- at least do it for yourself." He said in a subduing way.
"What truth?" I asked, even more muddled than before.
"Tell me that you don't feel anything, tell me you honestly don't feel anything. Tell me you don't have a heart, tell me you don't care about your parent's divorce at all and I will let you go." He said slowly like he really had some kind of control over me. The sad part was that in this moment he did.
My lips quivered, but I still remained inert, he wasn't going to win this fight.
"Tell me Melody. Tell me how you fucking feel! Do you even care at all?! Do you have any emotions at all, or are you just that apathetic?" He hissed in my face, shaking me a little bit.
I couldn't take it anymore, I started shaking more and more and he only reacted by gripping my wrists tighter. "Yes!" I squealed. David was getting his way with me and I didn't like it. "I have emotions, I fucking care okay! I'm scared, I'm sad and I'm angry! What more do you want from me?!" I pleaded with him.
"Nothing, that was all that I wanted" He whispered to me deviously, with his breath suddenly feeling colder against my cheeks.

Chapter 23: Video Girl

"Poison Ivy? really?!" Allyson shrilled, as if I were crazy. 

"What? It is posion ivy!" I retorted. It felt extremely cold in here, and this stupid uniform was only making it worse.

  "Why are you even talking to me right now? I thought you wanted nothing to do with me?" I asked her. Everyday she complained about being here. Everyday she complained about her mother. Everyday she complained about me, yet here she was trying to talk to me. Actually, she was just being nosey. Adrianne confronted me about the blemish on my neck when I got home last night and it was pretty obvious Allyson heard our conversation. Allyson scowled and threw a scarf at me.

"I'm just trying to help your ass!"  I held it out in my hands, perplexed. Why couldn't she mind her business?

"I told yo-" Allyson shook her head at me and proceeded to cut me off before I could even attempt to finish my sentence.

"You didn't tell me anything- the only thing you told me was a really bad lie...So now I'm going to teach you how to lie properly" 

Allyson threw herself onto my bed while sighing, taking full posession over my bed. 

"Okay first things first when you tell a lie you have to make sure it makes sense!" She laughed and kept going on, teaching me how to lie. 

"Secondly, say something that makes it seem as if it's obvious you wouldn't do what you're being accused of-like 'oh you really think I would do that?'... it makes you seem more innocent"  Allyson looked at me, expecting me to respond but I didn't.

 "Okay next, you have to make sure you're quick and whatever you do- don't say 'uhhh' or 'ummm' and don't look all around, keep eye contact with the person"  

Allyson was teaching me how to lie but I think she forgot the fact that by telling me all of this, she was unconciously teaching me more about herself and how she lies, like it's okay.

"And last but not least, say something that is true- even if it's a small thing just say it to cover your ass"

I looked down at her, grimacing  as I said "That sounds pretty dumb and I'm pretty sure I don't need your advice on how to lie because I'm telling the truth" I lied to her, while leaving the room, going upstairs to grab my backpack, ignoring her plea for me to stay in the room.

Perhaps that was a bad idea, maybe I should've stayed and listened to Allyson's absurdity a little longer. 

"There you are! I was wondering if you know what happened to this bottle of Bourbon Whiskey. Adrian got it for me-well the both of us and there's not much left" My uncle asked me while holding the bottle up in the air, studying it before he set it down on the counter and looked over at  me mystifyingly. That sudden eagerness in his voice made me a little skittish. 

"Um-" Shit, don't say that. Be quick, be fast. Say something!  I looked him in the eye, solemnly and tried not to look away from him. "No! Why would you ask me that? Did you take a second to even look at mom during the wedding? She was drinking everything in sight, she had bottles lined up on the freaking table! I went upstairs to go to the bathroom and she was in the kitchen getting more stuff to drink-I think she has a problem" He looked at me like he was pitying me after I said that, I hated that look  but  God damn, that felt incredible. I lied and he actually believed me. Okay, maybe I shouldn't have thrown my mother under the bus like that but it was the truth for the most part. 

"I'm sorry things are going this wa-" He started to talk but I cut him off.

"Don't be sorry for anything! I'm fine, Jess is fine, dad's fine, we're all fine...It's just mom who's acting crazy" 

"Well I'm sorry I questioned you, I guess I'm just more worried about you now that your parents split up. You know I'm always hear to listen if you want to talk..."

"Yes I know but you don't have to be worried about me, I'm fine. I should really get going now, I don't want to keep Adrianne waiting" 

"Well, I hope your day goes well" It was time to go back to that hell hole of place, called school.

I went outside to the Bmw that Adrianne and Allyson were impatiently sitting in. I opened the door, threw my bag in on the other side and as soon as I actually took a seat and closed the door Adrianne zipped off, driving like a bumble bee, fast yet intentive if that even makes any sense. The smell of the leather seats was enough to make me naeous, I hated that new car smell, it was too potent and I was pretty damn sure it was toxic too. Vrrmmm, my phone vibrated in my pocket. David sent me a text that said 'Video girl :p' whatever the hell that meant, he  hadn't exactly talked to me since last night yet he had the nerve to send me a dumb text like that.We reached a stop light, and Adrianne started talking to Allyson which ended up turning into an argument.

"Allyson!" Adrianne hollered.

"What?!" Allyson asked, throwing her arms up in the air.

"Your uniform that's what! You look like you belong on the corner of an alleyway in the city. Why did you wear red fishnets? I swear if you get sent home for breaking the dress code, I'm not coming to get you!" Adrianne protested, like an enraged politician.

"Why not? Is it because you're going to be too busy laying in bed with Croy while your legs are open?" Gheez, Allyson really had no censor what so ever, thanks to her I now had a disturbing image floating around in my head.

My body became one of those crash dumbies you see on car commercials, jerking forward as Adrianne pulled into the parking spot, nearly assaulting the brakes with her foot.

"Watch your mouth! You know Allyson, I don't know what makes you think it's okay to talk to me that way"

"Because you're a fucking hypocrite that's why! You're so in denial to your own hypocrisy and it irritates me- the guy got you a brand new BMW for christ sakes it's obvious you're fucking him!  You're so worried about me wearing red fishnets, I think you should look in the mirror" Allyson was strange, why would she care about her own mothers sex life?

"That's enough! Shut your mouth Allyson, I won't hear your non sense anymore!" Adrianne yelled, and people in the parking lot were looking at us, but mostly me instead of Allyson and Adrianne. Why? I had no idea. "You need to work on getting your license because I'm tired of driving you around" Adrianne, turned back to me in the seat "You too honey, Croy told me you're going to be 16 soon, you should really start learning how to drive." She gasped before continuing "Oh! I have the perfect idea- I can teach you both how to drive on the weekends, that sounds like a plan to me" I looked at her after she said that and faked a smile, it was weird being around them. 

"Um you do realize we go to school on the weekends also? " I asked her and Adrianne tapped herself lightly on the forehead and mumbled something about having to make time for important things, which only sparked another argument to start with her and Allyson. 

Adrianne got tired of arguing with Allyson. She sighed and unlocked the car doors, telling us to have a good day. 

"Whatever" Allyson replied as she sighed, slamming the car door shut. We stood there watching  Adrianne drive off and as soon as the car was on the actual road Allyson rolled her eyes while flipping the bird at Adrianne, muttering under breath bitterly "Whore" .

"I can already tell this is going to be a long day" I whispered while covering my face, in embarrassment.

Walking into that tall and lavishing building was overwhelming all over again, it was like the beginning of the year all over again. This school was too much, sometimes I wished I could just go to a public school like all the other normal kids. Sitting in a room with your guidance counselor first thing in the morning isn't exactly the way anyone wants to start their morning yet here I was talking to my guidance counselor, Ms. Leer. "Welcome back, Ms.Wiggins...Everyone's excited to see you. How are you feeling?" She asked me, while smiling too widely. This school was weird, sometimes it felt like some kind of utopia.

"I'm fine, I just wanted to give you my clearance note" I said handing it over to her.

She looked it over and said "Hmm, yes I see. Let me just put that in the system" She started typing on the computer but that didn't stop her from trying to engage in conversation with me. "So how was your Thanksgiving?" She pried.

"Good" I answered quickly, just trying to get this over with.

"Are you cold?" She asked me as she slowly stopped typing, eyeing me up and down.

"Kind of..I guess. Why?" I asked her, she probably was wondering why I wasn't wearing those ugly khakis most of the students wore during this time of the year, I was probably the only one still wearing this silly skirt.

"Well, you have a scarf on and I don't think it's that cold in here...Outside, yeah but not in here-you do know that you are technically breaking the dress code?" She asked me sternly.

Was this lady serious? It was just a freaking scarf, it wasn't like I paraded in here wearing jeans. "Well, I find nothing wrong with it, it's just a scarf" I said casually.

She stood up, handed me back my clearance note, wrote me a pass and handed that over to me while she said. "Are you being snippy with me?" 

I froze dead in my tracks, like a deer in head lights. "No-not at all, I just think it's a bit ridiculous how a scarf is a violation to the dress code-it's fall and people are going to get cold" I said trying to sound as nice and logical as possible.

There was no getting through to this lady, she was like a soldier. "Take it off, now!" She nearly yelled at me. I sighed, and abided to her order, taking the scarf off. After I did that she examined me, her eyes focusing on my neck.  She rolled her eyes and  opened her mouth to say something but then stopped. "I'm cold!" I yelped "This is unfair" I added.

She frowned at me and gave me no mercy. "Well maybe next time you will wear the FALL uniform, which consists of actual pants instead of a skirt Ms.Wiggins. I will not keep squandering my time with you, get to class" After she said that to me, I shoved the scarf into my back pack on the ground, and picked it up throwing it over my shoulders and did as she said, not even bothering to say anything to her. I thought guidance counselors were supposed to be warm and friendly, not cold and bitchy.

I got to my first class of the day, history. I walked in, and everyone was practically staring at me Iike I was Jesus, I was late. "It's the video girl!" A kid in the back shouted out as he pointed towards me. What the hell? I walked over to Mr.Hillford and handed him my pass, he looked it over and nodded, going on with his lesson which was extremely boring beyond belief. All he was talking about was Chinese people and some Opium war. I sighed while he talked about Britain this and China that and heroin this and opiate that. 

"Oh my gosh how horrible, drugs are bad!" One girl cried out in the back.

Some random guy sitting in the back was shouting and I was still nealry half asleep. "I got it! That's why Chinese people look that way, all those years of using opium must have really fucked up their eye lids!"

I put my hands on my face, shaking my head back and forth. Everything was very confusing and boring, I had no idea what was going on. 

Rinnng! Saved by the bell. Thank god, this class was as tedious and dull as hell, if not more. Everyone left the class and that was when I stood up and walked over to Mr.Hillford.

"It's good to see you back Melody" He chirped. His voice was so out of the ordinary for a man, some of the kids debated over whether or not he was gay, I felt bad for him because he had a wife and 3 kids that would have to grow up hearing people talk bad about their own father.

"Yeah, I'm glad to be back" lie. I would rather be at home, staring at the wall instead of standing here right now. "I missed alot-" 

He cut me off and assured me not to worry about anything. "I excused all of the assignments you missed, just worry about what we're doing in class now and we'll worry about the stuff you missed at the end of the year when it's time for finals" A thousand pounds was lifted off my shoulders after he said that.

"Thanks, I will try my best" I said.

"No worries, I know you won't even need to try, you're smart" He said as other kids started to fill up the classroom. And with that, I walked out of the door, thanking him once more.

*********************************************************************

There were only 4 more periods left in the day, yet it felt like I had been here forever. I sat there looking up at the clock in the library, figuring out how much time I had left to read this book. I noticed some people look over in my direction and I sank down even lower in my seat, I was already in the most desolate part of the library, if I tried to hide anymore I would be nearly invinsible.  I was supposed to be in the cafe eating but I figured that would be a bad idea with all of the attention I had been getting. Everyone had been calling me "video girl" all freaking day.  Nearly everyone was obsessed with that silly video of me singing, and my neck. They asked me all kinds of crazy questions,the weirdos asked me about vampires and the normal people asked me questions that were quite innapropriate and intrusive.   I looked down at the book in my hands and fell back into reality. I focused on the words in the book until I was interrupted by a girl sitting down in front of me.

 "Hi!" She squealed, grinning away.

"Uh, hi?" I said, sluggishly.

"You're the video girl right?" She asked

"Look, I don't get why everyone keeps calling me that it was just a silly video of me singing who cares?" I said throwing my hands up in the air.

"Ummm 5,000 people care. Have you not checked the views on the video?" She asked. 

"5,000?" I asked her again, shockingly. I hadn't looked at the views on that silly video for a whole month but 5,000 was alot.

"Yeah, 5,000! And you're in a band with David right? That's all he talks about these days you know- I wouldn't be surprised if he quit football, he's a good player but he never seems enthusiastic about it...He goes through the motions, you know what I mean?" 

I guess alot of things can change in a month. I looked at her and then I looked down at the book in my hands and said "Well, that's great and all but nothing is that serious, the band, the video, none of it so you can keep raving about it all you want but I'm trying to read this book and I would really appreciate it if you'd just leave me alone. I haven't had a moment to myself all day"

The girl slowly rose up from the seat and put her hands up, like she were surrendering to a cop. "No problem, I was just trying to talk to you. But David's looking for a drummer, if that doesn't sound serious to you then you're indenial. Oh and by the way! You've got a little something on your neck"  She said as she walked away from me, staring at my neck before she turned around the corner. How embarrasing, fuck Ms.Leer that old hag was the reason why people had been questioning me about my neck all freaking day. I placed my hand over the blemish on my neck. An image of two plush pillows filled my mind as I thought about those lips, David's lips. We did need a drummer for our band but David never told me he was actually looking for one. He drove me crazy, he was so random sometimes and it just got on my nerves even though we did make some beautiful music together.

I shook all of those thoughts out of my head, trying to focus on the black and white text in front of me, I started reading. ' Tyler was running from the beast behind him. The beast was roaring behind him and chasing him like a lion, Tyler knew he was no match for this beast. Tyler knew he couldn't even possibly escape this beast so now it was time for him to choose his fate. Should he keep running or stop. It was life or-'  Boom! My heart sunk to the pit of my stomach, I gasped for air as my eyes followed  the bronze arms all the way up the face of the person standing in front of me, David. "Ugh! You fucker! Why would you do that?! You almost gave me a heart attack!" I blared out to him, but he just kept laughing as if possibly giving someone a heart attack was actually funny.

"Man, you're too funny, video girl" He teased.

"Don't you dare! My name is Melody, get it right" I retorted.

"But every calls you video girl now" He said, trying to push me further over the edge.

"Screw everyone else! Video girl sounds innapropriate..." I said quietly, looking over to the side.

"No, you just have a dirty mind" He said ,laughing all throughout his sentence.

"It's not funny David! I hate attention- a warning would've been nice" I said and he quickly fired back at me.

"Hey, hey hey! I texted you this morning, that was your warning" He said, sarcastically.

I heaved a sigh and rolled my eyes at him. "Look, I'm trying to read what do you want? How did you even find me back here anyways? Don't you have a class to be in?" I asked him defensively.

"Oh please! It's not hard to find you anywhere, some girls walked out of here talking about the 'video girl' and that's how I knew you were in here and no I'm not going to class, that's actually why I came here. I wanted to know if you would want to ditch with me?" He asked me. What the hell was wrong with the universe these days? The stars definitely weren't in line with the moon because never in a million years would David had asked me a question like this 3 months ago. 

"Ditch? Like ditch school...Right here? Right now?" I asked, trying to make sure this wasn't some joke. I looked him in the eye, he wasn't smiling or anything. Shit, he was serious.

"Uh- yeah you know what, nevermind. It was a stupid idea anyways, I don't know what I was thinking" He said as he backed away from the table and said "Enjoy your book I'll just go to class" He started to walk away and it felt like a year was passing by as he did so.

"Wait!" I yelped, and he turned around looking at me.

"Yeah?" He asked casually, with his face somewhat drawn downwards as if he were truly upset that I declined his invitation a few seconds ago.

"I- I wanna go...With you" I stuttered, nervously like a child who was just learning how to speak.

"Really?" He said, frowning at me. "This isn't a joke, right?" He asked.

"No! It's not a joke David. Let's get out of here!" I said with anticipation ringing all throughout my voice. 

David smiled and looked at me, it felt like the world stopped spinning right in that very moment. "Well? What are you waiting for? Let's go, I don't have all day!" He said trying to sound serious but it didn't work because he started laughing and I did too. I didn't hesitate any longer, I got up from my chair, threw all of my books into my backpack as quickly as I could and we walked out of there. To where? I had no idea but I didn't care. I didn't care if we were going to a nursing home, I didn't care if we were going to a garbage ridden landfill. Somehow, and someway I knew this was going to be a memorable day.